September 30, 2012

If you were to open up a baby's head - and I am not for a moment suggesting that you should - you would find nothing but an enormous drool gland.

~Dave Barry


Dear Johnny,

Happy Fifth Monthday!  For the occasion you grew a pair of little white teeth.  They popped out simultaneously today, and they are very, very sharp.  The days of cute nibbling on fruits and stuffed toys and Mommy fingers is over.  Now you can chew right through them.

We celebrated your brand new teeth and your monthday by attempting to finally take some family portraits, but I have to say Johnny, they didn't turn out so great.  Daddy felt too awkward because Mommy kept telling him to be natural.  Mommy looked fat (and that is totally your fault).  Shelby slept under the bed and missed the whole thing, and you, baby, refused to even look at the camera.

All things considered, though, it was a good day, so let's keep them coming - the months AND the teeth!

September 26, 2012

I find television to be very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go in the other room and read a book.*

Dear Johnny,

You are an avid reader.  Your entire face lights up when I produce a book, and you passionately kick and laugh and try to eat the pages as I turn them over for you.  We are still lingering on the picture books, but soon enough we'll go on all sorts of amazing journeys, following the adventures of the inhabitants of Middle Earth, the predicaments of a high-school drop out who dislikes phonies, the quest for finding a great white whale; the struggle of one nation for independence, and of one family for a better life on the other side of a country; we'll witness time transcending love and fantastic tales set in space; and we'll even invent our own stories, inspired by our own wonderful adventures.

* Groucho Marx

September 23, 2012

Dadiness is Happiness

Dear Johnny,

Today Daddy turned 33.  For his birthday Mommy got the new iPhone 5, you got to ride a big black dog, and Daddy got to witness it all while sipping on a glass of organic red wine from a limited California vintage that Grandpa brought for the occasion.  Grandma took photos, and later we went for a walk around the neighborhood.   

You like birthdays, Johnny.  We should have these more often.

Mommy's photos from the event here.

September 21, 2012

I Should Be So Lucky

Dear Johnny,

You are so gorgeous it makes my heart hurt.  You radiate this amazing tranquility and pure, unconditional happiness that is contagious, and every time I look at you I can breathe a little easier, and I know that I can overcome any obstacles life decides to throw my way.  Thank you, baby.  The sleep deprivation and the weight gain were totally worth it.

In other news, Johnny, you are now almost 5 months old and you are still 2 months ahead on the developmental scale.  You wear size 4 diapers, you eat solids, and you are sort of crawling.  Mommy and Daddy still can't quite afford to indulge in, respectively, genius prose writing and bad-ass coding, but we certainly can afford a babysitter, so we hired one and we hope to at least catch up on wine drinking and date nights.  

Your fans can see more awesome recent photos of you here and here.


September 14, 2012

Cat Shaming


Dear Johnny,

Your big sister Shelby is a cat celebrity.  She's being photographed constantly, she's on the Internet all the time, and now she's been featured in the world famous Cat Shaming website.  The reason for this, Johnny, is not Shelby's pretty face or her fluffy fur.  Your big sister is so renowned because of her silliness.  She sleeps in funny places, she says funny things, and she does mischief at every chance she gets, especially since when you are around.  Her favorite activity of late is to meow her head off exactly when we're putting you to sleep.  She also likes to bop you on the head when we're not looking.

You are a great little brother, Johnny.  You love her enormously, regardless.  

September 10, 2012

Let The Good Times Roll

Dear Johnny,

Daddy finally figured out how to commute to work with the train (public transport isn't American suburbia's most renowned quality, Johnny, but that's okay - one day you'll experience the glorious railways of Europe) and he left us the car to use as we see fit.  You and I have already explored the neighborhood by ways of stroller and carrier, so today we drove down to the park and had a blast.  

We saw squirrels there, guys playing ball, mommies and other babies at the playground (although we kind of snubbed them, because we're not into play-dates and we prefer to do our thing), old ladies enjoying the sunshine, bicyclists, and local teenagers wasting time.  We relaxed on the grass, we looked at the redwood trees, and we sang songs together, you and I.  And you were such a good baby, Johnny!  You didn't cry during the ride, and you didn't whimper when you got tired.  We listened to the radio on the way back, and your Daddy's favorite song came on - Soul to Squeeze.  Ah, good times!




Monkey Business

Dear Johnny,

The other day I left the room for a minute, and when I came back, I saw this:


Your stuffed tamarin has transformed into a geek chic Lion Monkey.

I hope you'll turn out to be a prankster just like Daddy, because Johnny, he is hilarious.

September 4, 2012

All That Jazz

Dear Johnny,

Mommy doesn't play any musical instrument (unless you count the conga, but then again I have a terrible sense of rhythm), so thankfully you have taken after your Daddy.  He used to be in a dixieland band when he was younger, and he plays the piano and the guitar pretty nicely.  This weekend we went to your grandparents's house, where you wasted no time in spotting your Daddy's old upright Baldwin.  You make a beautiful music, Johnny, yet what I love about your performances is the passion you put in every note.

I would say your creations are a bit on the jazz side, though genius cannot be categorized.